Introspection: Highs and Lows

I share these thoughts, hoping they are of help to someone else.

Highs and Lows

Scripture:

Where can I go from Your Spirit?
Or where can I flee from Your presence?
If I ascend into heaven, You are there;
If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there.
If I take the wings of the morning,
And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
Even there Your hand shall lead me,
And Your right hand shall hold me.

Psalm 139:7-10 (NKJV)

Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of me

From "You Never Let Go" by Matt Redman

Every year at Thanksgiving I try to get everyone at the dinner table to say something for which he or she is thankful. This year I said that I was thankful for a new job and a new outlook on life. My new job had brought me a much-needed sense of purpose and self-worth, and, without the shame that had weighed me down the last couple of years, I was able to feel happy once again.

This new outlook on life showed through in my behavior. I got out of the house more often; I came out of my shell a little more; and I was enjoying life. I felt as though I was truly living and not just dying very slowly. At one point, it seemed that everything was going my way. I was on a high.

Unfortunately, highs do not last forever. Setbacks and disappointments brought me back down to reality, and old patterns of insecurity, envy, frustration, and self-pity began to re-emerge in my life.

One evening recently, events did not unfold as I had hoped, and I sank, once again, into a funk. Thankfully, my gloom did not last very long. A new day dawned, and with it came it's own small joys and successes. I bounced back.

My life has gone through a lot of changes lately, on the outside and on the inside. I lost the shame and dread that had been tearing me apart from the inside. After that I went through a time of numbness, boredom, and uncertainty. Then I found myself on a high resulting from certain long-time problems finally being resolved. Now I feel as though things in my life have leveled off, and I am back to my typical ups and downs.

My parents can attest to the fact that I am a very moody person. Sometimes it seems as though there is a slippery slope between my highs and lows. Lately, this fact has caused me to reflect on the highs and lows of life.

We all would like for everything in life to go our way, but we know that cannot happen. When we were given life, we got a package deal. We have good days, and we have bad days. We receive blessings, and we also receive trials. We have to take the good with the bad and the ugly.

In this journey of life, we will see both mountain tops and valleys. Sometimes the road will be smooth, and sometimes the road will be rocky. If you are blessed with a high, be thankful to God, and savor every moment. If you are going through a rough time that is testing your heart, realize that God is with you the whole way and that "this too shall pass." Wherever you currently find yourself, whether you are high on life or in a funk, know that the LORD who "giveth and taketh away" ¹ is always with you.


Notes:
1 - Job 1:21