Notes from the Wayside: Introspection: Don't Look Up, and Don't Look Back

Sunday, March 26, 2023

Introspection: Don't Look Up, and Don't Look Back

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Don't Look Up, and Don't Look Back

I'm not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don't get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I've got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward - to Jesus. I'm off and running, and I'm not turning back.

Philippians 3:12-14 (The Message)

I never got anywhere by running away
I never learned anything without a mistake
I never loved anyone by playing it safe
It's a long way down, but I'm here right now

From "Here Goes" by Bebo Norman

During May, June, and July of last year, when the college for which I work was closed to the public on Fridays, I was given the option to either work from home on Fridays or to work four ten-hour days per week and take Fridays off. I chose the latter option. My new work arrangement was definitely a tradeoff. Though I did not especially like the long workdays, I did enjoy having extra day on the weekend. Last year was stressful for me for various reasons, so, on some of my Fridays off, I retreated to state parks in my area in order to get away from my normal life for a few hours.

I'm lucky enough to live about fifteen minutes away from Paris Mountain State Park.¹ Though I have lived in the same area my entire life, I have only visited this state park a handful of times. On my first visit last year, I just explored the park and relaxed by the lake for a while. On subsequent visits, I hiked some of the trails. I'm not an experienced hiker, and I'm not the most physically fit person in the world, but I was still able to hike the park's most strenuous trails with little difficulty.

Since February, my work schedule has allowed me to take every other Friday off, so I've been waiting for another opportunity to go hiking, but the weather has been somewhat less than accommodating. A couple of days ago, my opportunity finally came, so, on Friday morning, I picked up some breakfast and headed to the state park.

I decided to hike the park's most strenuous trail, the Sulphur Springs Trail, which I first tackled back in June of last year. This trail is a roughly three-and-a-half-mile loop which takes me a little less than two hours to hike. From the normal starting point, the first half of the hike will be uphill, regardless of the direction one decides to walk. The first time I decided to hike this trail, I noticed that, according to the trail map, there is one section of the trail that is closed to bicyclists.² Figuring that this section would be the most difficult part of the hike, I made it a point to start walking in the direction that put it in the first, uphill half.

The hike is easy at the beginning, but the relatively level path inevitably gives way to a rather steep uphill climb. I quickly figured out why this part of the trail is closed to bicyclists. At some points, I had to climb over rocks and hold onto trees to keep my balance. At other points, I had to step from rock to rock to cross streams. At a couple of points, I had to stop and catch my breath. If hiking this trail is a microcosm of life, then I consider this particular section of the trail the most important, because it has taught me the most.

Perhaps you've seen a television show in which a character who is not especially fond of heights finds himself in a precarious situation in a very high place. Invariably someone says, "Don't look down!" so that the acrophobic character doesn't panic and fall. Having hiked the Sulphur Springs Trail twice, I have learned that there are a couple of other directions one might do well not to look - on the trail and in life in general.

The first time I hiked the steep part of the trail, there was at least one time when I looked up at the climb ahead of me and questioned my decision to hike the trail in the first place. That said, I knew that I didn't want to turn around and head back the way I came. As tired as I was, I figured that a downhill climb would be riskier than an uphill climb. I had already gone too far to turn back, so the only way to go was forward. When I hiked this part of the trail again a couple of days ago, there were times when I looked up at the climb ahead of me and started feeling discouraged. When I started to focus on the steps immediately ahead of me, just putting one foot ahead of the other, I made it up the hill just fine.

Sometimes in life, it is best not to look up, and often it is pointless to look back.

There are things I would like to accomplish in my life, but, when I consider everything that would be required of me, I find myself hesitant to even get started. If I want to accomplish something big, there are times when I will have to stop thinking about the process as a whole and to instead focus on the step immediately ahead of me. As I complete each step, I will have to keep moving on to the next, until I have finally reached my goal.

At one point on the trail, there is a sharp turn. Once I make this turn, I know that the steep uphill climb is behind me and that I will be walking steadily downhill for the rest of the hike. At this point, I know that I can just enjoy my walk and take in the scenery. Having been through a few difficult years, I hope that someday in the not too distant future I will start feeling this way about my life in general.