Introspection: Where Are You, God?

I share these thoughts, hoping they are of help to someone else.


Where Are You, God?

Scripture:

Why, O Lord, do You stand far off?
Why do You hide Yourself in times of trouble?
In arrogance the wicked persecute the poor -
let them be caught in the schemes they have devised.

For the wicked boast of the desires of their heart,
those greedy for gain curse and renounce the Lord.
In the pride of their countenance the wicked say, “God will not seek it out”;
all their thoughts are, “There is no God.”

Their ways prosper at all times;
Your judgments are on high, out of their sight;
as for their foes, they scoff at them.
They think in their heart, “We shall not be moved;
throughout all generations we shall not meet adversity.”

Rise up, O Lord; O God, lift up Your hand;
do not forget the oppressed.
Why do the wicked renounce God,
and say in their hearts, “You will not call us to account”?

But You do see! Indeed You note trouble and grief,
that You may take it into Your hands;
the helpless commit themselves to You;
You have been the helper of the orphan.

Psalm 10:1-6, 12-14

You led me here,
Then I watched You disappear
You left this emptiness inside
And I can't turn back time
No, stay!
Nothing compares to You
Nothing compares to You
I can't let You go

From "Never Be the Same" by RED

You can probably tell from some of my previous articles that my life is not like I want it to be. Frustrated with being a perpetually single, self-conscious introvert, I sometimes find myself actually becoming indignant that my circumstances are not what I think they should be. I just feel robbed, cheated out of the life that I think I should have, a life that seems to come so naturally to other people. I become angry, angry with myself for being the way I am, angry with my parents for the way they raised me, angry with other people for making me feel invisible, angry with society for being like it is, and even angry with God for letting - or making - me to be the way that I am.

In the past few weeks, I have noticed a number of people referencing the Psalms as examples of honest prayer.¹ Feeling a little indignant regarding my circumstances, I decided to search the Internet for Psalms that deal with anger toward God. In my search results,² I came across the tenth Psalm which begins:

Why, O Lord, do You stand far off?
Why do You hide Yourself in times of trouble?

The one who wrote this Psalm begins his prayer upset with God for seeming inactive and even absent in a time of great turmoil. It is as if the psalmist is saying, "Where are You, God? Why aren't you doing anything? Are you even watching this?" The psalmist then continues to vent - to God - his feelings of anger about the injustice going on all around him, about how cruelly the wicked among the rich and powerful are treating those less fortunate and about how much they seem to profit from it. He goes into great detail about how he feels, describing how he views the greedy, the ruthless, and the godless, comparing them to lions stalking their prey. The psalmist then asks God to take action and to punish those who have been abusing others.

With the fourteenth verse, the tone of the Psalm begins to change. The psalmist, Having expressed his anger and frustration, begins to remember the truth that God is always present, that God always hears our prayers, that God is in control, and that God cares about the oppressed and the needy.

Many of us feel uncomfortable with the idea of being angry with God. It is God who created the universe. It is God who has given us all of the blessings we have experienced in this life. It is God who has shown us such great love, mercy, and grace. What right do we have to be angry with such a wonderful God? Whether or not anger toward God is ever justified is actually irrelevant. If you are angry with God, condemning yourself for your anger, burying your anger under positive thinking, or pretending that you're not angry will not make the anger go away.

I recently heard someone say that one should treat his or her relationship with God as one would treat a relationship with a friend or a family member. For many of us, prayer can seem like speaking to some imaginary friend up in the sky; however, God is a very real person in each of our lives. When you are angry with a friend, what do you do? Do you bury your anger, or do you tell your friend how you feel? If you bury your anger, giving it the opportunity fester within yourself, you risk destroying your friendship. The right thing to do is to tell your friend how you feel. Regardless of whether you are right or wrong in your anger, a true friend will listen to you and respect your feelings. By telling your friend how you feel, you open the door for reconciliation.

All relationships require work to maintain, and all relationships have times of difficulty. Why should one's relationship with God be any different? Much of the Bible deals with the relationship between God and the people of Israel. Interestingly enough, the word Israel means "struggles with God."³

When we pray, we may feel as though we are talking to the ceiling, wondering if anyone is actually listening to us, but prayer is actually a two-way conversation. When we speak to God, God not only listens but also speaks back to us, though it is not necessarily audible. When we pray, we open ourselves up to God's healing and transforming power in our lives.⁴ I think that this may have been what the author of the tenth Psalm experienced. Once he opened up to God, expressing all of his feelings, he began to remember the truth of God's presence, mercy, and love.

I have seen this phenomenon in my own life in the last few weeks. Recently I began asking God for a major change, specifically a girlfriend. God has not yet given me a companion, but I believe that God has been working within me more noticeably since I started praying. I feel as though God is preparing me for a relationship with another person by bringing healing into my life and by teaching me lessons about patience, hope, trust, and openness.

I will not tell you that anger toward God is justified, and I will not condemn anger toward God. If you ever do feel angry toward God, tell Him! Tell God how you truly feel, knowing that God is a true friend who listens to you and who cares about your feelings. Realize that prayer is a two-way conversation and that God will speak back to you, giving you the opportunity to be transformed and to draw closer to Him.


Notes:
1 - For two examples, see the following:
Sharing the Journey: "Praying FOR Others"
Upper Room Daily Reflections: "Praying the Psalms"
2 - Thinking Christians: "Angry Prayer"
3 - Genesis 32:28
4 - Rob Bell. Nooma 019 | Open. 2008, Flannel / Zondervan.


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