Perspective: You Have a Drum

Merry Christmas from the Wayside!


You Have a Drum

Scripture:

...they set out; and there, ahead of them, went the star that they had seen at its rising, until it stopped over the place where the child was. When they saw that the star had stopped, they were overwhelmed with joy. On entering the house, they saw the Child with Mary his Mother; and they knelt down and paid Him homage. Then, opening their treasure-chests, they offered Him gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh.

Matthew 2:9-11

Shall I play for You?
Shall I play for You?
Mary looked at me and nodded
The ox and lamb kept time
I played my drum for Him
I played my best for Christ
I played my best for Christ

Then He smiled at me

From "Little Drummer Boy" as performed by MercyMe

So it's almost Christmas! If your part of the world is like mine, then you have noticed that certain local radio stations have been playing nothing but Christmas music for the past five or six weeks. This fact has its advantages and disadvantages. The good thing about it is that it can help you get into the Christmas spirit. The bad thing is that, if there is a Christmas song that you don't particularly like, you will probably hear it about five hundred times over the course of a few weeks.

One of the better Christmas songs, in my humble opinion, is "The Little Drummer Boy." You probably know the story well, especially if you listen to soft rock stations. A young boy goes to the stable to see Jesus, the newborn King. Unlike the wise men, he is poor, so he cannot afford extravagant things like gold, frankincense, or myrrh. He feels as though he has no gift worthy of a king, but he gives Jesus the one thing that he has to offer Him, a song on his drum. The boy plays his heart out for Jesus, and, when he is finished with his song, the Christ Child looks at him and smiles.

This story is familiar to many of us, but let's step back for a moment and take a different look at this tale. Let's look at it, not just as a cute Christmas story, but as a metaphor for our lives.

Many of us find ourselves wanting to do something great for Christ. Unfortunately, we sometimes look at the things that other people are doing in the world, and we become discouraged. We feel as though we don't measure up to these people. We look at our own abilities and feel as though we have nothing to give, no talents worthy to offer our King. We think that, if we just had the gifts and talents of others, then we would have something to offer Him.

Despite our feelings, though, we each have something that we can offer Christ. We have each been blessed in some way. Maybe we feel as though our gifts and talents do not sparkle like gold or that they are not fragrant like incense or myrrh. The fact of the matter is that we each have a "drum" of some sort. We each have a "song" to play for Jesus through our lives.

Our offering does not have to be something extravagant. The things that Christ values the most are the things that we do to glorify God and to help others. Christ says that whatever we have done for those in need, we have done for Him. ¹ In the Sermon on the Mount, He calls such acts "treasures in Heaven." Unlike earthly treasures that do not last forever, heavenly treasures last for eternity. ²

Another facet of the story that I think is worth noting is the fact that nothing is mentioned of the skill of the boy playing the drum. It simply says that he played his best for the Christ Child. The truth is that you do not have to be a "Ringo Starr" or a "Phil Collins" to play your "drum." You do not have to be the best at what you do to bring an offering to Christ; He simply wants you to do your best.

My exhortation for us all is is that we take our "drums," whatever that means for each of us, and that we play our best for Christ. Let's play our hearts out, hoping that someday, when each of us finally meets Jesus, He'll smile and say "Well done, good and faithful servant." ³


Notes:
1 - Matthew 25:34-40
2 - Matthew 6:19-21
3 - Matthew 25:21

Introspection: Highs and Lows

I share these thoughts, hoping they are of help to someone else.

Highs and Lows

Scripture:

Where can I go from Your Spirit?
Or where can I flee from Your presence?
If I ascend into heaven, You are there;
If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there.
If I take the wings of the morning,
And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
Even there Your hand shall lead me,
And Your right hand shall hold me.

Psalm 139:7-10 (NKJV)

Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of me

From "You Never Let Go" by Matt Redman

Every year at Thanksgiving I try to get everyone at the dinner table to say something for which he or she is thankful. This year I said that I was thankful for a new job and a new outlook on life. My new job had brought me a much-needed sense of purpose and self-worth, and, without the shame that had weighed me down the last couple of years, I was able to feel happy once again.

This new outlook on life showed through in my behavior. I got out of the house more often; I came out of my shell a little more; and I was enjoying life. I felt as though I was truly living and not just dying very slowly. At one point, it seemed that everything was going my way. I was on a high.

Unfortunately, highs do not last forever. Setbacks and disappointments brought me back down to reality, and old patterns of insecurity, envy, frustration, and self-pity began to re-emerge in my life.

One evening recently, events did not unfold as I had hoped, and I sank, once again, into a funk. Thankfully, my gloom did not last very long. A new day dawned, and with it came it's own small joys and successes. I bounced back.

My life has gone through a lot of changes lately, on the outside and on the inside. I lost the shame and dread that had been tearing me apart from the inside. After that I went through a time of numbness, boredom, and uncertainty. Then I found myself on a high resulting from certain long-time problems finally being resolved. Now I feel as though things in my life have leveled off, and I am back to my typical ups and downs.

My parents can attest to the fact that I am a very moody person. Sometimes it seems as though there is a slippery slope between my highs and lows. Lately, this fact has caused me to reflect on the highs and lows of life.

We all would like for everything in life to go our way, but we know that cannot happen. When we were given life, we got a package deal. We have good days, and we have bad days. We receive blessings, and we also receive trials. We have to take the good with the bad and the ugly.

In this journey of life, we will see both mountain tops and valleys. Sometimes the road will be smooth, and sometimes the road will be rocky. If you are blessed with a high, be thankful to God, and savor every moment. If you are going through a rough time that is testing your heart, realize that God is with you the whole way and that "this too shall pass." Wherever you currently find yourself, whether you are high on life or in a funk, know that the LORD who "giveth and taketh away" ¹ is always with you.


Notes:
1 - Job 1:21

Introspection: Adapt or Amputate

I share these thoughts hoping they are of help to someone else.

Adapt or Amputate

Scripture:

If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.

Matthew 5:29-30 (TNIV)

My dead heart now is beating
My deepest stains now clean
Your breath fills up my lungs
Now I'm free. Now I'm free!

Into marvelous light I'm running
Out of darkness, out of shame
By the cross You are the Truth
You are the Life; You are the Way

From "Marvelous Light" by Charlie Hall

Earlier this year, if you asked me about my job, I would probably answer you with something vague. Some answers I would give people who asked me were, "I'm a computer programmer," or "I work at a small company in town," or "I do C programming." These statements were all true, but they fell short of telling people what they really wanted to know about me. Even in my past writings I only admitted to working in a shady industry.

The fact of the matter is that I was ashamed of my job because I worked in the gambling industry for a company that manufactured slot machines and video poker machines. I helped write the software on which the machines operate.

Even before I started working at this company, I was afraid of what people would think. The United Methodist Church, of which I am a member, takes a rather strong stance against gambling. What would the people at church would think? What would my Christian friends think about my working on machines on which people waste hundreds of dollars at a time while letting their families go without?

I told some people about my job, usually stating that that it was not something I wanted to do my whole life. I could tell by the reactions of some that they thought my job was uncool. Others thought it was interesting. Some said that I should just be thankful that I had a job. A few wanted me to tell them how to beat the machines my company produced. ¹

There is a tendency in our society for people, men especially, to define themselves by the work they do. I fell into this trap, and, because I was ashamed of my job, shame became a driving force in my life. To cope, I tried to compartmentalize my life. I wanted to keep my job in a little box that was only opened from 8:30am to 5:00pm every day, completely separated from the rest of my life.

The results were ugly. I exhibited strange behavior and developed a bad attitude. I wore certain clothes to work and changed clothes immediately after I came home. I ate the same thing every day. When work started to seep into the rest of my life, like water through a crack in a dam, I became irritable. The idea of working overtime angered me. I hated for my supervisor to call me on my cell phone, especially after hours.

After about a year of working for this company, the dam broke. I found myself in a crunch that caused me to have to work a good deal of overtime over the course of a week. I had lived for the weekend, and now even that could be taken from me. I developed a silent animosity for my superiors at work.

After this crunch situation was over, I decided that I needed to get out of this job. I wanted to quit, but I was afraid that I would have trouble finding another job afterward. I could have tried looking for another job, but I wasn't sure if another programming job would be any better. I lamented majoring in computer science and considered changing careers, but I was not sure if that was my calling. I simply did not know what to do, so I started praying. Every morning, I prayed that God would call me away from my job.

After nearly a year of praying and soul searching, God answered my prayers. My company consolidated offices and moved out of state, giving me a valid reason to leave my job. The source of my shame was gone, but being unemployed did not make me feel much better about myself. As I looked for another job, I decided that I needed something I could take pride in, something to which I could dedicate myself. I decided to put my faith in God to lead me to where I needed to go, and God blessed me with a new job as a programmer at a local technical college.

In the weeks after I was hired, my whole outlook on life changed. I was back among the living. I became more sociable and got out of my house more often. I even started to enjoy programming again. For the first time in years, I was high on life. At this time, I realized how much my life was truly crippled by shame.

To you, the reader, I urge you to do what you must to get shame out of your life. Shame is an obstacle that keeps us from living life to the fullest. Shame is a roadblock that separates us from the abundant life that God intends for us.

Perhaps you are ashamed of something that you cannot change. In this case, adapt. First, come to terms with this thing and accept it as a reality. Once you have done that, learn to live with it as best as you can. If you are, for example, dealing with a physical problem, accept yourself for who you are, but do not think that your problem is what defines you. Seek out others who are living with the same problem and see what they do to rise above their situation.

Perhaps the thing causing you shame is something that you know is wrong in your life. Maybe it is, for example, a sin or an addiction. If this is the case, amputate. Cut it out of your life like a gangrenous limb. No matter how attached you are to this thing, it would be far better for you to lose this one part of your life than to put yourself through a living hell. Get rid of it, but do not live with a gaping hole in your life. Replace the thing that breaks you down and brings you shame with something that builds you up and makes you a better person.

Maybe you are in a situation where you simply do not know what to do about the source of your shame. Perhaps you don't know whether you need to adapt or to amputate, and you feel like your back is against the wall. If this describes your situation, pray to God for guidance and seek help. There are some problems in this life that we simply cannot handle on our own, but, thankfully, God never expected us to face life by ourselves. If we place our hands in His, He will lead us our of our shame.

Christ came to Earth so that we might have life and experience it abundantly. ² This includes a lot of things, but it does not include shame. May God guide you out of the darkness of guilt and shame and lead you into the light of abundant life.


Notes:
1 - Here and now I reveal the secret to beating slot machines and poker machines: don't play them! The house always wins.
2 - John 10:10b

Introspection: There Is No I in Christ

I share these thoughts, hoping they are of help to someone else.


There Is No I in Christ

Scripture:

For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. For in the one Spirit we are all baptized into one body... and we were all made to drink of one Spirit.

1 Corinthians 12:12-13

Your will above all else, my purpose remains
The art of losing myself in bringing You praise
Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame

My heart and my soul
I give You control
Consume me from the inside out
Let justice and praise
Become my embrace
To love You from the inside out

From "From the Inside Out" by Hillsong United

Last month, as I anticipated starting my new job, I spent a couple of days doing some volunteer work. The college ministry with which I am involved held its fall break mission project at a nearby boys' home, so I was privileged to join some of my college-age friends in doing some odd jobs around the place.

When we arrived the first day, I saw two other friends who, knowing that I work work with computers, asked me to help them with a problem they were having with home's computer network. For part of the time, instead of working with my college friends as I had expected, I left them behind to join another friend in running tests, trying to diagnose the network problems. We were not able to resolve the problem in those two days, but we did discover some important clues.

I enjoy doing volunteer work, but this experience made me realize that I have a great deal to learn about presenting myself as a "living sacrifice" to God. The truth is that I had my own agenda. Traditionally, service work has been an opportunity for me to get away from computers. With a field that requires me to rack my brain figuring out problems, manual labor can be theraputic. Instead of working on computers, I wanted to spend these two days doing grunt work with my friends in the group. It was not a sinister agenda, but it was still an agenda.

In the First Epistle to the Corinthians, St. Paul calls all followers of Jesus Christ collectively the "Body of Christ." What he means by this is that, like the parts of the body, each follower has a different purpose in the ministry of Christ. Though we all don't have the same gifts, we all have something to bring to the table. No one person's place in the body is any less important than anyone else's, so we shouldn't envy the gifts of others but do the best to cultivate our own. ¹

We Christians are all part of something far greater than ourselves, so sometimes our own wants and needs must be put aside so that the Body can function better as a whole. As Christians, we are called to die to ourselves and live for God's purposes. Our lives should echo the words of John the Baptist, "He [Christ] must increase, but I must decrease." ²

Though I wanted to be the hands that did the cleaning, painting, and organizing, for part of the time, I was called to be the hands that serviced the computers in one of the classrooms. Of course, this was only part of the time. I still got to do the other things with the group, and I even got to go to dinner with them at the end of the day. Even though working on the computers was not something I really wanted to do that day, I am glad that I got to use my gifts for God. I am also thankful that God used this time to teach me this important lesson.


Notes:
1 - I Corinthians 12:12-31
2 - John 3:30

Introspection: I Kissed Hopelessness Goodbye

I share these thoughts hoping they are of help to someone else.

I Kissed Hopelessness Goodbye

Scripture:

Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don't try to figure out everything on your own.
Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; He's the one who will keep you on track.

Proverbs 3:5-6 (The Message)

What sad memory of yesterday
What terrible scar
Keeps you gathering the pieces of
Your shattered heart?
There was once upon a time
When hope was living within
I know there will come a time
When you can believe again

From "Like I Love You" by Amy Grant

In the past few months, God has led me out of a bad situation, through a time of uncertainty, and into something better. The thing in my life for which I was tearing myself apart inside is now gone. The weight on my heart and on my conscience has been lifted. Without this problem consuming my thoughts, I feel as though I am back among the living, and I am able to focus on other things.

In the past I had a tendency to keep to myself, but in the past few weeks I have found myself desiring to be around people. Lately, I have been spending a lot of my "alone time" in places where there are people. For example, it is not uncommon for me to go to the bookstore or some other place late at night. In fact, at the time I finished writing this, I was eating lunch downtown, using the free WI-FI. I think that the reason for this is partially having the aforementioned weight lifted from my heart as well as another factor in my life: my loneliness.

One day after work last week, I went to many of the different places I frequent until I found myself, once again, at the shopping mall, where I oddly seem to have a lot of epiphanies. As I walked though the mall I found myself preoccupied with one aspect of my loneliness that has troubled me a great deal in the past.

Once upon a time, I aspired to fall in love and to get married. Having had my heart handed back to me a few times in the past, I had become jaded. In the past few years, I have been trying to come to terms with the possibility that I may be facing a life without a mate.

I have noticed that there is a tendency in this world for a person to put too much importance on his or her own marital or relationship status when it is really not the most important thing in life. Though I often fall into this trap, I know that I can live a meaningful, fulfilling life without a woman. St. Paul once noted that marriage can divide one's attention between serving God and serving one's spouse. ¹ People who are unmarried are freed up to devote their lives to doing great things for God. ² Perhaps a wife or a girlfriend was not something God wanted for my life.

Reminding myself of the benefits of being single had brought me some comfort, but the desire for companionship remained.

As I walked through the mall and perused the stores, I contemplated my problem. What went wrong? Was I still brooding over the wounds that I received back in high school? Did I give up on love after my first broken heart? Is the problem, perhaps, much deeper than that? In my insecurity, did I give up on love before I even began seeking it out? ³

I went the tea store where I ordered my new favorite drink, a green tea frappe. I took my drink back to the food court and sat down. Shortly afterward, a young woman sat down at the table in front of me with a bag from Chick-fil-A and began eating dinner alone. As I watched her eat, I began to wonder if she felt the same way I did. Was she too at the mall because she was feeling lonely, desiring to be around other people?

I wanted to speak to her, but I am terrible in these situations. In my insecurity, I often feel as though I need to put on some sort of act around women. I feel like I have to act cool when, in reality, I'm not. As a result, I come across as fake, weird, or even creepy. I knew that if I were to approach her, I had to be myself, completely open and vulnerable, but I did not know what to say. I was tongue-tied. I was at the point of asking God to give me something to say to her.

The problem with frozen drinks is that when they run low they are hard to drink through a straw because the ice sticks together. One remedy of this problem is to shake the drink. Unfortunately, when I shook my frappe, there was still some green tea at the top of the straw which flung out onto the sleeve of my jacket and onto the table. As I tried to clean up my mess with my bare fingers, inspiration stuck. I walked up to the woman in front of me and said...

"Do you have a napkin I can borrow?"

I had broken the ice! She gladly gave me a napkin, and, thankful, I went back to my table to finish cleaning up the mess. Nothing else was said between the young woman and myself. She finished her dinner and left the food court, and I too decided it was time to head home.

I believe that this incident was an immediate answer to prayer. God had given me a way to break the ice when I was unable to find the words to do so. By not continuing the conversation, perhaps I passed up the chance to make a new friend or even to meet my soul mate. Maybe it was not meant to be. I do not understand what God's intentions were, but, if nothing else, I feel as though God was saying to me, "I am with you in this too." I laughed as I walked back to my car. I knew that God was my Creator, my Redeemer, and my Sustainer, but my dating coach?

God cares about all parts of my life, even those I so bitterly trivialize. Perhaps it is time for me to reclaim the hope that I will someday fall in love and be loved in return. I realize that I need to work on certain things for this to happen, though. I need to let go of the bitterness of heartaches in the past. I have to take off the mask and burn down the facade, opening myself to others so that they can see the real me. Most of all, I need to rely on God to strengthen me to do the things I cannot do on my own.


Notes:
1 - 1 Corinthians 7:32-35
2 - Dave Rhodes, "Interrogative: Is it Lawful for a Man to Divorce His Wife?", Wayfarer/Engage
3 - I hate using the word love in this context. In our culture, we tend to lump a lot of different things under the word love, unlike the Greeks who have language to categorize these things (philo, eros, agape, etc.). While I have not known the love of a wife or a girlfriend, when it comes to fraternal love, familial love, and God's love, I consider myself blessed.

Perspective: My Political Manifesto

My friend Sam recently posted his thoughts on politics on his blog Static Truth. Check out his article here. With politics on my mind lately, I felt the need to do the same, so I share these thoughts, hoping they are of help to someone else.

My Political Manifesto

Scripture:

For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in creation, will ever be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:38-39

When peace like a river attendeth my way
When sorrows like sea billows roll
Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say
It is well, it is well, with my soul

From "It Is Well with My Soul" by Horatio Spafford

I have never been active in the political world. I grew up with one side of my family on the political right and the other on the political left. With opinionated people on both sides of my family, it is easy for me to get frustrated with politics. When asked about my political views, I generally avoid siding with either of the two major groups and say something on the fringe like "libertarian," "individualist," or even "anarchist." I once even told someone I was with the Green Party.

It seems that no matter who is in office the time, there are generally three groups of people. One group thinks that the president is a messiah who is going to save the world. At the same time, another group of people thinks that the current government is going to usher in the apocalypse. The fence straddlers like me just seem to float on through.

I find it interesting how faith affects the political views of different people. Two Christians can look to their faith for answers and end up on completely different ends of the political spectrum. With the many issues involved, from the sanctity of life to social justice, this is understandable. When I went on my first mission trip in college, my campus minister got into a heated political discussion with our liaison in the ministry with which we were working. One was on the left because of her faith, and the other was on the right because of his faith.

People on the right and on the left can be quite passionate about politics. I would like to ask, as Christians, how much should politics matter to us?

If we look at the history of Israel in the Bible, we can see that the Israelites found themselves in numerous different political situations. When the Israelites received the Law and with it the call to be God's people in the world, they were nomads in the desert, seeking the promised land. They would go on to settle Canaan and, after years of struggle, establish themselves as an independent nation. Under the reign of King Solomon, the Israelites built the Holy Temple and even became a political superpower. ¹

Corruption caused the nation to split into two. ² Both nations were eventually conquered, and the Israelites were taken into exile. Even in exile, their call to represent God never changed. The Book of Daniel contains wonderful stories of people who stayed true to their calling and of how God's hand of protection was upon them. Later on, the Israelites were allowed to return home, to rebuild, and to rededicate themselves to God. For the rest of their Biblical history, they would be subject to foreign empires, some more benevolent than others.

In the Bible, we see Israel as tribes of nomads, as an independent nation, as a superpower, as a group of exiles, and as a province of an empire. In each of these situations, the Israelites were always the Chosen People of God, and their call to represent God in the world never changed.

Politics change; nations and governments change; but the things that truly matter never change. No matter who is in office and no matter what kind of regime rules this nation, I know that my Father is the Lord Almighty, that my family is the community of faith, that my citizenship is in the Kingdom of God, and that my calling is to show God's love to others. Furthermore, I know "that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in creation" will ever change these things.

I am not trying to promote political apathy. Our elected officials deal with many different issues, and their decisions affect many people. Whether you find yourself on the left, on the right, or somewhere in between, if your love for others leads you to political activism, then please follow your convictions. At the same time, realize that whether or not things end up the way you believe they should, our relationships to God and to others should never change.

Perhaps the government will never fix the health care system. Even so, we are still called to come together and bear each other's burdens. Perhaps someday we will find ourselves under a fascist regime with no regard for civil rights. Even so, we are still free from sin and guilt in Jesus Christ. Christ calls us to inner peace, even in the midst of "wars and rumours of wars." ³

Politics and nations change, but God never changes. Whatever your political views and whatever type of nation you find yourself in, may God's unchanging love give your heart peace.

Notes:

1 - Rob Bell and Don Golden, Jesus Wants to Save Christians, Zondervan

2 - Dave Rhodes, "On the Verge of a Big Decision", Wayfarer/Engage

3 - Matthew 24:6

Introspection: My Enemy

I share these thoughts, hoping they are of help to someone else.


My Enemy

Scripture:

For we know that the law is spiritual; but I am of the flesh, sold into slavery under sin. I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.

Romans 7:14-15

I cry out to God
Seeking only His decision
Gabriel stands and confirms
I've created my own prison

From "My Own Prison" by Creed

It has been said, "Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life." Whoever said that should have included this as the next line: "Hate your job, and you will put in a lot of unpaid overtime." I know this from experience.

My first job as a professional computer programmer was in an industry that is, to say the least, frivolous; some would even consider it to be harmful. When I took the job, my boss said that he wanted a real commitment from me. When I got to know my co-workers, I found that he was not kidding. Some of them had to respond to problems after office hours, often working late into the night. Others would go out of town, working night and day on installations and maintenance.

Some of my co-workers did not do a good job of balancing their work and their lives at home, causing their marriages and their families to suffer. My boss and his wife hardly ever saw each other because their careers kept them on separate continents. Two other co-workers who were married to each other split up, and I speculate that workaholism was no small part of it. My supervisor would put in time at the office and then go home and work until early in the morning, causing his wife to often become angry with him. Later on, he began working out of town during the week, putting even more strain on his family and on his marriage. He even once joked that he forgot what his children looked like.

I could not understand how these people could put their jobs first in their lives, especially in this particular industry. I feared that my boss expected no less of a sacrifice from me, and I feared that my supervisor sought to mold me into his image. I vowed not to let this happen. I was determined not to let my job take over my life.

As paranoia sank in, my boss became my enemy. I saw him as a ruthless slave driver with no sense of human compassion, and I saw my supervisor as his obedient servant. My days started to feel like eight-hour panic attacks, full of dread for what my boss and my supervisor might demand of me next. Each new demand became a further intrusion into my personal life. I lived for the weekend, and I spent most of the weekend dreading the next week. I was miserable.

Eventually, I came to the realization that I had done exactly what I had set out not to do. I was doing the thing for which I condemned my co-workers. I had put my job first, allowing my personal life to suffer. I was not putting in the same hours as my co-workers, but by consuming myself with worry and dread, I was giving my job first place in my life. My fear that my job would take over my life had become a self-fulfilling prophecy. In my mind, I saw my boss as my enemy, but my true enemy was no one else but the man in the mirror. I put myself through a hell of my own imagining.

Most of my fears never came true. In the twenty-three months I worked at that job, I only worked one weekend, and I only worked one late night. I only had to stay late at the office a handful of times, and most of the time I was able to leave at five o'clock. Some of the time, I actually had trouble keeping myself busy. Despite all this, my boss and my supervisor were generally pleased with my work. Looking back, I have to admit that I had it pretty easy.

Unless I someday get the chance to ask God directly, I may never know whether or not it was His will for me to take that job. Nevertheless, I have learned some important lessons from my experience. First, a person should try to find work to which he or she can be dedicated. This is my top priority as I look for my next job. Second, it is important for one to balance his work and his personal life, whether or not he likes his job. When I find my next job, I hope that I will, at the end of the day, leave my work at the office and live the other parts of my life to the fullest.

Introspection: Skydiving with God

I share these thoughts, hoping they are of help to someone else.

Skydiving with God

Scripture:

Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.

Hebrews 11:1

Sometimes it's hard to just keep going
But faith is moving without knowing
Can I trust what I can't see
To reach my destiny?
I want to take control but I know better

From "Unbreakable" by Fireflight

I was driving down the road today, contemplating my current situation, and I found myself wishing that there was more certainty in my life. I want to be certain that I will enjoy my next job. I want to be certain that I will someday find my true calling. I want to be certain that I will find happiness in this life. At that moment I remembered a quote by Anne Lamott: "The opposite of faith is not doubt: it is certainty." It then occurred to me that perhaps my problem is not a need for certainty, but a lack of faith.

Some people think of their faith like an insurance policy. If they agree to the terms of the policy by believing all the right things and sign their name on the policy by praying the "Sinner's Prayer," they know that when they die they will go to heaven and not hell. I am not trying to trivialize Salvation. I believe that, when Jesus Christ died on the cross, he took the punishment for all our sins, and that trusting Him with our eternal destiny is important. I also believe that faith means much more than just escaping hell when we die.

I have come to believe that true faith is less like buying insurance and more like jumping out of an airplane. I have never been skydiving, nor am I the type of person who would ever try it. I do know that those who do go skydiving put a lot of faith in their parachutes. In fact, skydiving means betting your life that your chute will open. It means depending on your parachute to see you safely to the ground.

The writer of the Epistle to the Hebrews defined faith as "the assurance of things hoped for" and "the conviction of things not seen." We cannot literally see, hear, or touch God. Furthermore, we have no way of knowing what the future has in store for us. This is why we need faith. Faith is following God in spite of the uncertainty and in spite of the lack of physical evidence. Faith is jumping out into life with God as our parachute, depending on Him to see us safely through.

Having faith does not mean that one never has doubts or that one never feels afraid. Perhaps you are scared to jump out of the plane. Perhaps you even have doubts that your chute will open. Faith is jumping out of the plane when God calls us to jump, in spite of our fears and doubts.

In my case, faith means jumping out into the future, trusing in God to open the doors I need to step through, to close the doors I need to avoid, and to lead me to where I need to go.

Introspection: Praying Outward

I share these thoughts, hoping they are of help to someone else.

Praying Outward

Scripture:

Bear one another's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

Galatians 6:2

Please swallow your pride
If I have things you need to borrow
For no one can fill those of your needs
That you won't let show

Lean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on

From "Lean on Me" by Bill Withers

One evening last year, I was walking around a local department store, and I saw a man that I knew from my job back in college. He asked me how I was doing, and, as I normally do in such situations, I replied with a boisterous "Pretty good!"

I lied. To be fair to myself, it was more of a programmed response than an outright lie, but, all the same, I was not being honest about how I really felt at the moment. I acted as though I was happy, but, in reality, I was miserable that evening. I was tearing myself apart from the inside with stress, worry, and dread. I was letting the burdens of my life get to me in such a way that, at times, I had trouble just enjoying life.

I want people to think that I have it all together, but sometimes nothing could be further from the truth. Looking back on that meeting with my old friend, I realized just how foolish I was being. By not telling people how I really felt, I was depriving myself of getting help. Later that night, I decided to send out an email to various people I know, explaining my situation, my feelings, and my need for help.

Things started to change after I sent out that email. The people to whom I sent it came to my help, and new opportunities opened up in my life that not only got my mind off of my problems but also strengthened me spiritually and gave my life more meaning. By being open with my feelings, I let God work in my life through others.

It is important for us to send our prayers upward to God, but perhaps we should also let our prayers go outward as well. Perhaps God sometimes answers our prayers by putting people around us who can help us. If we conceal our problems from others, perhaps we are depriving ourselves of the grace God can give us through them.

Singer-songwriter Bill Withers grew up in a small coal mining town. Reflecting on the townspeople's strong sense of community, he wrote the song "Lean on Me." ¹ This popular song encourages people to be there for each other and to not be afraid to ask for help.

I think that this song describes the type of community that God wants us to live in. Throughout the Bible, we are urged to help each other, to encourage each other, to hold each other accountable, to pray for each other, to bear each other's burdens, and to love each other. God wants us to be in community with each other because He never intended for us to take on this life alone.

When you find yourself with the weight of the world on your shoulders, do not pretend that everything is fine. You will not be doing anyone else a favor. You will only be depriving yourself of the grace that God wants to give you through others. So when you have problems, send your prayers upward to God, but allow them to radiate outward as well. Do not be afraid to ask others for help.

At the same time, be willing to help shoulder the burdens of others. Let God work through you. Allow yourself to be an instrument of God's grace. In this way, you will be doing your part to build the type of community that God intended.
Notes:
1 - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lean_on_Me_(song)

Introspection: Jellyfish and Currents

I originally shared these thoughts, in a much less developed form, with a group at a Salkehatchie camp. I share them here, hoping that they are of help to someone else.


Jellyfish and Currents

Scripture:

Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but will have the light of life."

John 8:12

And this is how it feels when I
Ignore the words You spoke to me
And this is where I lose myself
When I keep running away from You
And this is who I am when
When I don't know myself anymore
And this is what I choose when
It's all left up to me

From "Breathe Into Me" by Red

I was walking on the beach recently, and I saw a jellyfish lying on the beach, stranded. This is a pretty common sight for beach-goers, but, for me, this sight hit really close to home.

Up until the last few years of my life, I never really cared about anything. I spent most of my life living without passion, drive, or purpose. I never got involved in anything meaningful. I just... drifted.

The problem with living this way is that drifting can lead a person somewhere that he or she really does not want to be, much like the way a jellyfish ends up stranded on the beach. In the past couple of years, I have come to learn that lesson the hard way. I did not seek meaning in life, so I should not have been surprised when I did not find any. In fact, I had previously used the analogy of the beached jellyfish to describe how I felt.

The same week that I saw the jellyfish, I was sitting in a Bible study, signing up for an online group to carry on the things we had been studying. It was then that I realized that going with the flow can sometimes have good results. For example, when I went on my first mission trip in college, I was pretty much going with the flow, doing what my friends were doing. There were several other such opportunities that I participated in at the urging of friends.

So why does going with the flow sometimes have good results, while other times it leaves one stranded and helpless? What makes the difference?

The answer is the current. A person who drifts around, following any current has no idea where he is going or how he will end up. A person who lets God be his current, on the other hand, knows that God will lead him where he needs to be. Christ has promised to guide us through the darkness of this world if we will follow Him, the Light of the World.

To you, the reader, I urge you not to drift your way through life. Let God be your current, and swim with all your might.


Jellyfish photo by Lee R. Berger is used under the GNU Free Documentation License.

Introspection: Open My Eyes

I share these thoughts, hoping that they are of help to someone else.

Open My Eyes

Scripture:

Do you still not perceive or understand? Are your hearts hardened? Do you have eyes, and fail to see? Do you have ears, and fail to hear?

Mark 8:17-18 (NRSV)

I found God
On the corner of 1st and Amistad
Where the West
Was all but won
All alone
Smoking His last cigarette
I said, "Where You been?"
He said, "Ask anything."

From "You Found Me" by The Fray

Some days after work, I like to go to the local shopping mall. I walk around, visit the stores, and look at the other people. Sometimes I go to the food court to get an egg roll and a soda, but very rarely do I actually do any shopping. I've realized that my visits to the mall are less about shopping and more about clearing my head.

It was the week of Valentine's Day, and I saw a stand at the mall where people were selling balloons and other gifts. At this sight, I was hit with a rush of old familiar feelings. Valentine's Day has never been a particularly happy subject for me. In fact, my love life, or the lack thereof, has been a constant source of griping in my life.

I gripe and complain a lot. I used to complain about my height and my looks. When I was in school, I complained about the rules. I have always complained about my chronic state of being single. My major gripe lately has been my career choice. At the mall that day, I imagined what it would be like to confront God with my complaints once my life in this world is over. Then I came to a realization. While I cannot truly speak for God in this area, I believe that I know what the exchange would sound like.

First I ask God, "Why didn't You show me which career path to take? Why couldn't I find work I was happy doing?"

God replies, "You knew what you really wanted to do the whole time. You knew what I was calling you to do, so why didn't you do it?"

Then I ask God, "Why couldn't I find love?"

God responds with the name of a woman I knew, asking, "What about her? She loved you! Why did you ignore her?"

As I imagined that conversation with God, I began to wonder if it was true that everything I ever really wanted or needed has been right in front of me the whole time. Have I been asking "Why me?" while completely ignoring the answers I was truly seeking? Have I been too busy complaining to see that I really have nothing to complain about? Am I like Christ's disciples, having eyes but not seeing and having ears but not hearing? Have I hardened my heart and become blind and deaf by my own accord?

Perhaps what I need the most right now is enlightenment. Like King Solomon, I must pray for wisdom. I must ask God for the discernment to find his will for my life and for open eyes, open ears, an open mind, and a tender heart that I might see the abundant life He has already given me.

Sermon: Thomas the Believer

Delivered at Bethel United Methodist Church on April 19, 2009.


Thomas the Believer

Scripture:

When it was evening on that day, the first day of the week, and the doors of the house where the disciples had met were locked for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” After he said this, he showed them His hands and His side. Then the disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you.” When He had said this, He breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.”

But Thomas (who was called the Twin), one of the twelve, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in His hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in His side, I will not believe.”

A week later his disciples were again in the house, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were shut, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” Then He said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.” Thomas answered Him, “My Lord and my God!” Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe.”

Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of His disciples, which are not written in this book. But these are written so that you may come to believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that through believing you may have life in His name.

John 21:19-31

How long will my prayers seem unanswered?
Is there still faith in me to reach the end?
I'm feeling doubt I'm losing faith
But giving up would cost me everything
So I'll stand in the pain and the silence
And I'll speak to the dark night
I believe in the sun even when it's not shining
I believe in love even when I don't feel it
And I believe in God even when He is silent

From “I Believe in Love” by BarlowGirl

Do you ever doubt? Do you ever doubt yourself? Do you sometimes wonder if you are cut out to do what God has called you to do? Do you ever doubt your salvation? Do you wonder if your faith is strong enough? Or do you have trouble believing that all sins can be forgiven? Do you ever question the things you have been taught? Do you, for example, have trouble believing that Jesus was born of a virgin? Or do you wonder how Jesus could have possibly fed five thousand people with only a few loaves of bread and a couple of fish? Do you ever doubt God? Do you ever wonder if God will keep all the promises He made in the scriptures? Or do you ever just lie in bed awake at night, staring at the ceiling, wondering if there is actually anyone up there listening to your prayers? Whether or not we want to admit it, we all go through times of doubt.

It was Sunday evening, and the disciples were hunkered down in their meeting place with the door locked. They were going through a rough time, to say the least. Their Rabbi, whom they had been following for three years, was brutally executed two days earlier. That morning, two of them went to the tomb to find that His body was missing. After that, Mary Magdalene started claiming that she saw Jesus alive and well. On top of all this, the disciples were still afraid of the mob that had Jesus put to death.

Suddenly, Jesus appeared out of nowhere saying, “Peace be with you.” He showed the disciples his scars, and they rejoiced that their Lord was with them once again. He breathed on them the Holy Spirit and commissioned them to continue the work He started. Unfortunately, the disciple Thomas was not with the others that evening. The other ten told him that they saw Jesus, but Thomas had trouble believing that. He even went so far as to say, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in His hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in His side, I will not believe.”

St. Thomas is probably the most famous doubter in human history. We even use the term “Doubting Thomas” to deride a person for having doubts. We give Thomas a hard time for doubting, but we really cannot blame him. Think about it: if someone came up to you and said that he just saw Elvis, you probably would not believe him. Put yourself in Thomas’s shoes. You have been a disciple, shadowing a rabbi for three years. You were with Him when He was arrested by the Sanhedrin, and you witnessed His farce of a trial. You saw Him mocked, beaten, nailed to a cross, and hung up to die. If someone told you, a few days later, that this Man was alive and well, you would probably be a bit skeptical, as would I. Today, I thought it would be nice to give Thomas a break and to look at some of the other great doubters in the Bible.

GIDEON

Let’s go back to a time before Israel had kings to a time when the nation was still fighting for its place in the Promised Land. Israel had been under siege by the Midianites for seven years. God heard the cry of His people, so he called a young man named Gideon to liberate the nation from the Midianites. Empowered by the Holy Spirit, Gideon rallied the people together to fight. Gideon had doubts about his mission, so he requested a sign from God. He said,
In order to see whether you will deliver Israel by my hand, as you have said, I am going to lay a fleece of wool on the threshing-floor; if there is dew on the fleece alone, and it is dry on all the ground, then I shall know that you will deliver Israel by my hand, as you have said.
When he got up in the morning, the fleece was soaked but the ground was dry, just as he had requested; however, Gideon still had doubts. He asked God to be patient with him and requested another sign. He said, “Let me, please, make trial with the fleece just once more; let it be dry only on the fleece, and on all the ground let there be dew.” The next morning, he found the ground wet and the fleece dry.

The time came for the attack, but God only allowed Gideon to take three hundred men to attack the Midianites, whose forces are described as “countless as the sand on the seashore.” Once on the television show MacGyver, a man’s plantation was attacked by a swarm of killer ants. Everywhere one looked, as far as the eye could see, ants covered everything. I imagine that this is what the Midianite army looked like, and God expected Gideon to fight them with only three hundred men. Gideon was still having doubts, so God told him to sneak down to the enemy camp for another sign. When he got there he overheard a man talking about his dream. He then overheard another man interpret the dream as an omen that they would be defeated at the hands of Gideon. Gideon returned to his camp, ready to commence the attack.

ELIJAH

Now let’s go forward a few hundred years to the time when Israel was split into two nations. The Northern Kingdom of Israel was ruled by the corrupt King Ahab and the wicked Queen Jezebel both of whom promoted the worship of a false god named Ba’al. God called the prophet Elijah to speak out against Ahab and Jezebel and to combat their false religion.

Elijah had just won a major victory against the prophets of Ba’al. He presented the prophets with a challenge: both sides would prepare a sacrifice and call upon their respective gods to accept it. The prophets of Ba’al spent all day crying out their god trying to get him to accept their sacrifice, but it was to no avail. Elijah then built an altar, dug a trench around it, and drenched the sacrifice with so much water that the trench filled up. He called on God, and fire came down from Heaven and consumed the sacrifice, the altar, and the water in the trench. Elijah then proceeded to slaughter all four hundred fifty prophets of Ba’al.

When Queen Jezebel heard about this incident, she was hell-bent on seeing Elijah put to death. Elijah fled into the wilderness and, in a moment of doubt said, “It is enough; now, O Lord, take away my life, for I am not better than my ancestors.” Angels brought him food, and he proceeded to Mount Horeb. When Elijah was resting in a cave, God told him that He was about to pass by. Then there was a strong wind, and then an earthquake, and then a wildfire. God was not in any of these but the silence afterward, and in a still small voice asked, “What are you doing here, Elijah.” ¹ Elijah responded,
I have been very zealous for the Lord, the God of hosts; for the Israelites have forsaken your covenant, thrown down your altars, and killed your prophets with the sword. I alone am left, and they are seeking my life, to take it away.
God responded to Elijah by assuring him that his mission would not fail and that he was not alone. He told Elijah to anoint Elisha to help him. God then told him that there were, in fact, seven thousand people in Israel that had remained faithful to the Lord. Elijah went down from the mountain, appointed Elisha as his disciple, and continued with his task.

PETER

Let’s move forward into the New Testament to the time of Jesus’ ministry in Judea. Jesus had just fed more than five thousand people with only five loaves of bread and two fish. Jesus went off by himself to pray, and the disciples, at His suggestion, got in a boat and headed over to the other side of the sea. The wind was strong, and the waves tossed the boat. The disciples looked out at and became afraid because they thought they saw a ghost on the water. In reality, it was Jesus, and He was actually walking on the water. He said to them, “Take heart, it is I, do not be afraid.”

Peter, eager to follow in his Rabbi’s footsteps, called out, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.” ² Jesus tells him to come to Him, and Peter began walking on the water too. Peter noticed the rough waves and starting doubting. When he doubted, he began to sink. He cried out to Jesus, “Lord, save me!” Jesus reached out and grabbed him and said, “You of little faith, why did you doubt?” When the two got into the boat, the wind died down, and the disciples worshiped Jesus, proclaiming Him the Son of God.

THOMAS REVISITED

Let’s look back at Thomas’s story. When the disciples told Thomas that they saw Jesus alive and well, Thomas made up his mind that he would not believe it unless he could see and touch Jesus’ scars. A week passed, and the eleven were back at their meeting place. Once again, Jesus appeared out of nowhere saying, “Peace be with you.” Directly addressing Thomas’s challenge, Jesus said, “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.” Thomas then proclaimed Jesus, “My Lord and my God!”

❑

As Christians, it is easy for us to get discouraged when we feel doubt. After all, we are called to believe. We might feel like we are faithless. We might even feel like we have failed God because we have doubts. As Christians, we tend to believe that there are just some thoughts we are not supposed to think and that there are just some feelings we are not supposed to feel, and, for many of us, doubt falls right into such a category. So we try with all our might to push the doubts out of our minds and to convince ourselves to believe. The problem is that stuffing down our doubts does not help. No matter how much we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the doubt will still be there.

Today I want to ask you a question: are faith and doubt really exclusive of each other? Does doubt signify a lack of faith, or does faith exist in the midst of doubt? Is it possible that doubt and faith are more connected than we tend to think? Philip Yancey, in his book Reaching for the Invisible God, writes:
Doubt is the skeleton in the closet of faith, and I know no better way to treat a skeleton than to bring it into the open and expose it for what it is: not something to hide or fear, but a hard structure on which living tissue may grow.
So doubt is an object on which something living can grow. Can living faith actually grow on top of doubt?

What do you notice about these four stories? Though the Bible exhorts us not to doubt but to believe, these stories speak volumes about God’s patience and about the grace He bestows to those who are going through doubt. Notice that in each of these stories God neither condemns the doubter nor becomes angry with him. In fact, God used these moments of doubt to strengthen the person’s faith.

Gideon doubted his mission and asked God for signs twice. God gave him both of the signs he requested and even offered him a third one. God reassured him that his mission would be successful, and Gideon led the troops into battle confident that God would give them the victory. Gideon and his forces defeated the Midianite army, and, as a result, Israel enjoyed forty years of peace afterward.

Elijah lost hope in the wilderness, but God, in the silence on Mt. Horeb, reassured him that his mission would not fail and that he was not alone. Elijah found the resolve to keep going and continued to fight the good fight. He continued to prophesy and to speak out against the corruption of the royalty and against the worship of false gods until the day he was taken up to Heaven in the fiery chariot.

Peter doubted when he walked on water with Jesus, but Jesus caught him when he started to sink. Peter would once again become overwhelmed with the storms of life and would deny that that he even knew Jesus. Jesus never gave up on him, but trusted him with the feeding of His sheep. Eventually, Peter came to the realization that, with God’s help, he could follow in his Rabbi’s footsteps. Peter became a great leader in the early church. On the Day of Pentecost, he preached to a crowd, and three thousand people dedicated their lives to Christ.

Thomas missed Christ’s first appearance to the disciples and doubted the Resurrection, but Jesus came back just for him. ³ He showed Thomas His scars, and Thomas proclaimed Him “My Lord and my God.” For this reason he is known to many, not as “Doubting Thomas” but “Thomas the Believer.” Thomas went on to become a great missionary. He is believed to be the only apostle to take the Gospel outside of the Roman Empire, going as far as India and China. ⁴

Perhaps doubt is simply a part of the journey of faith. Just as we are invited to cast our anxiety on God, let us also cast our doubts on Him as well. Let’s take a lesson from these stories of doubt and give God the opportunity to turn our doubt into stronger faith. According to the minister Harry Emerson Fosdick:
Faith without doubt is no faith at all. Ask your questions and have your doubts. That's a great thing. Just include God in on the conversation. If you do that honestly, the day will dawn when you question your questions and doubt your doubts. ⁵

MY OWN STORY OF DOUBT

I want to give you one more story of doubt. This one is not from the Bible, and the doubter has not done anything nearly as great as the things done by the men in the other stories.

Most people would not suspect this of me, but sometimes I have trouble managing my anger. One time I became angry about something that I no longer remember, and I broke the mouse I was using with my computer. I drove over to Wal-Mart, and, twenty dollars later, I had a new one. On the way back to my house, I was feeling really disgusted with myself. I began to wonder if there was any hope for me at all. I have a bad habit of changing the radio station as I drive. I changed the radio station, incidentally to the Christian rock station, and this was the song I heard:

I left the ninety-nine to find the one
And you’re the one
I walked a thousand miles in the desert sun
Only to bring you back ⁶

It has been said that “lost causes are the only ones worth fighting for.” Jesus came into this world to fight for those that the world had given up on. I don’t believe that it was a coincidence that I heard that particular song at that moment. I believe that God was using that song to remind me that He was not going to give up on me, the lost little sheep that I am.

❑

Do not be discouraged when you feel doubt. Instead, give your doubts to God. He will not forsake you for doubting. He did not give up on Gideon or Elijah. He did not give up on Peter or Thomas. He has not given up on me, and he will not give up on you. May God rain down his grace upon you so that your seeds of doubt grow into great faith.


Notes:
1 - Rob Bell, “005 Noise”, Nooma
2 - Rob Bell, “008 Dust”, Nooma
3 - Dave Rhodes, “Flirt: Love Lockdown”, Wayfarer/Engage
4 - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_the_Apostle
5 - Chris Brooks, “Flirt: Cloudy Faith”, Wayfarer/Engage
6 - From "To Bring You Back" by Paul Alan

Sermon: We Are Lepers

Delivered at Bethel United Methodist Church on February 15, 2009.

We Are Lepers

Scripture:

A leper came to him begging him, and kneeling he said to him, "If you choose, you can make me clean." Moved with pity, Jesus stretched out his hand and touched him, and said to him, "I do choose. Be made clean!" Immediately the leprosy left him, and he was made clean. After sternly warning him he sent him away at once, saying to him, "See that you say nothing to anyone; but go, show yourself to the priest, and offer for your cleansing what Moses commanded, as a testimony to them." But he went out and began to proclaim it freely, and to spread the word, so that Jesus could no longer go into a town openly, but stayed out in the country; and people came to him from every quarter.

Mark 1:40-45

Woe to me, I am unclean
A sinner found in Your presence
I see You seated on Your throne
Exalted Your glory surrounds You

From "Ruin Me" by Jeff Johnson

Leprosy, as we know it today, is a bacterial disease of the upper respiratory tract. The telltale sign that a person has the disease is that he or she will have lesions on the skin. If the disease is left to progress, permanent damage to the eyes, skin, limbs and nerves will result. Thankfully, there exist today effective multi-drug therapies that will cure leprosy. There are a number of common misconceptions about this disease. First, leprosy is not as contagious as people think. Most people are naturally immune to the disease. Plus, after the first few days of treatment, people with the disease are no longer contagious. Nevertheless, there are still some leper colonies in the world. It is also a common belief that leprosy causes victims’ body parts to fall off. This too is a fallacy. ¹

The man whom Jesus encountered in our reading today may not have had this particular disease. As many of you have probably read in a footnote in your Bible, the word leprosy is used as an umbrella term for a number of different skin conditions. The Hebrew word used to describe such conditions is tzaraath. If you would like to know what kind of conditions qualify, read Leviticus 13. The first forty-six verses of this chapter consist of criteria for diagnosing tzaraath and the rules and restrictions placed on those who have it. Just for clarification, from here on out when I use the term leprosy, I am referring to tzaraath and not the disease as we know it today.

The task of diagnosing leprosy was left to the priests. If a person had suspicious spot on his skin he was to be examined by a priest to determine whether or not it was leprous. If the diagnosis was uncertain, the priest would confine the person until the follow-up examination one week later. If the spot had spread, then the person was diagnosed with leprosy. Later on, if the disease were to clear up, a priest would make another examination. If the person had indeed been healed, a series of sacrifices and ritual acts was performed and person was given a clean bill of health.

The whole time a person had leprosy, he or she was considered to be unclean. Due to this chronic state of “uncleanness” the leper had to live under certain restrictions. Leviticus 13:45-46 reads:
The person who has the leprous disease shall wear torn clothes and let the hair of his head be disheveled; and he shall cover his upper lip and cry out, “Unclean, unclean.” He shall remain unclean as long as he has the disease; he is unclean. He shall live alone; his dwelling shall be outside the camp.
Thus a leper is condemned by the Law to a very wretched existence for the disease he carries and the uncleanness resulting from it. Being ceremonially unclean meant that the one was not allowed to worship at the Holy Temple, so a leper was, in a sense, separated from God. A leper had to make his condition evident by his appearance and had to announce his presence by shouting “unclean,” or else someone might become defiled by contact. A leper had to live alone, away from everyone else. Imaging being diagnosed with this disease and being forced to live in isolation away from your friends and family. In this way, leprosy caused a person to be alienated from others.

Leprosy also carried a certain social stigma. Lepers were among the untouchables in society because of their uncleanness. I have already mentioned that the Hebrew word for this condition was tzarrath. This word is derived from the Hebrew word for smiting, meaning that leprosy was thought to be punishment from God. Certain rabbinic texts list a number of sins that were believed to cause a person to be stricken with leprosy including: stinginess, pride, stealing, sexual sins, murder, gossip, and vain oaths. ²

To put things in perspective for modern times, leprosy could be compared to the AIDS virus. Like the lepers of biblical times, AIDS victims are often ostracized because of their disease. Furthermore, many people think that AIDS is punishment for sexual sins and drug use. While it is true that some people contract AIDS because of dirty needles and promiscuous behavior, that is not always the case. Likewise, the Bible tells of several occurrences where people were stricken with leprosy because of their sin, but I’m sure that is not true for all lepers. We know from the Book of Job that sometimes bad things just happen to good people, but I digress.

So in our story today this leper, isolated from others and stigmatized by society, breaks the rules placed on him and approaches Jesus, begging to be healed. He falls to his knees and says, “If you choose, you can make me clean.” Jesus, always one to buck tradition for the sake of other people, reaches out in his mercy and touches the man saying, “I do choose. Be made clean!” At this moment, the man was cured of his leprosy and became clean. According to the Law, one becomes defiled when touching a leper or other unclean person, so this means that when Jesus reached out and touched the leper, He himself became unclean. Jesus made the leper clean by becoming unclean. Perhaps it could even be said that Jesus took the leper’s uncleanness onto Himself.

We do not know much about the man in the story, but we can learn a great deal from the fact that he had leprosy.

• We know that he was condemned by the Law to a wretched existence.
• We know that he was, in a sense, separated from God.
• We know that he was alienated from others because of his condition.
• And we know that he was healed by Jesus Christ, who took his uncleanness onto Himself.

Now, I ask you, is any of this starting to sound familiar? Who is this leper?

I don’t believe that this story is just about some random leper that Jesus healed. I believe this story is also about us. This is the story of our own encounter with Jesus Christ. We, like the leper, are condemned by the Law, not for the spots on our skin, but for the sins on our heart. We have broken commandments; we have not loved God with our whole heart; and we have not loved each other like we should have. We have let our sins and our selfishness separate us from our Creator. We have estranged ourselves from the loved ones that we have hurt with our actions. So like the leper we approach Christ, unclean, diseased, and disheveled. We fall to our knees echoing the prayer “God, be merciful to me, a sinner.” Christ, in his love, reaches out and touches our stone cold hearts. He takes our sin from us, and we are forgiven, and we are made whole.

There is an interesting way in which some churches observe Good Friday. In this practice, the church prepares a wooden cross. Each person will write on a piece of paper a sin or a burden that he or she has been holding on to. The person will then take a hammer and nail the piece of paper to the cross, symbolically nailing that sin to the cross. I think that this is a very appropriate symbolic act, because Jesus paid the penalty for our sins when he was crucified. In II Corinthians, Paul writes, “For our sake He [God] made Him [Jesus] to be sin who knew no sin, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God.” When Christ was nailed to the cross, our sins were also nailed to the Cross. When Christ died, our sins also died. When Christ was buried, our sins were buried. But, unlike Christ, our sins stayed in the grave. Christ triumphed over sin and death. God says that He “will remember [our] sins and lawless deeds no more.” Christ has taken our sins from us “as far as the east is from the west.” We are forgiven; our slate is wiped clean.

When the leper was healed, Jesus told him not to tell anyone but to go and to be examined by the priest and to give the offering that was commanded in the Law. Just as it was the job for the priests to pronounce someone unclean it was also the job of the priest to pronounce someone to be clean again. The leper was so thrilled to be healed that he did just the opposite and told everyone he saw. This seemed to hinder Jesus’ ministry, because people everywhere start coming to Him with their ailments, taking the focus off of His message. This was not what the leper should have done, but it is a good example for us.

We need to let the world know that God loves us and that He has forgiven us. We need to show Christ’s love to others. We need to show them that they need not be condemned to some wretched existence estranged from God and from each other. We need to show them that there is another way to live: a life reconciled to the Creator and a life spent loving one another. We must let people know that they need not be slaves to their sin, their past, and their guilt. We need to break down boundaries just as Jesus did when he reached out to the leper. What better offering can we give God in honor of our healing?

We are lepers… but we have the Cure.


Notes:
1 - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leprosy
2 - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tzaraath

Sermon: Simeon and Anna

Delivered at Bethel United Methodist Church on December 28, 2008.

Simeon and Anna

Scripture:

When the time came for their purification according to the law of Moses, they brought him up to Jerusalem to present him to the Lord (as it is written in the law of the Lord, "Every firstborn male shall be designated as holy to the Lord"), and they offered a sacrifice according to what is stated in the law of the Lord, "a pair of turtle-doves or two young pigeons."

Now there was a man in Jerusalem whose name was Simeon; this man was righteous and devout, looking forward to the consolation of Israel, and the Holy Spirit rested on him. It had been revealed to him by the Holy Spirit that he would not see death before he had seen the Lord’s Messiah. Guided by the Spirit, Simeon came into the temple; and when the parents brought in the child Jesus, to do for him what was customary under the law, Simeon took him in his arms and praised God, saying,

"Master, now you are dismissing your servant in peace,
according to your word;
for my eyes have seen your salvation,
which you have prepared in the presence of all peoples,
a light for revelation to the Gentiles
and for glory to your people Israel."

And the child’s father and mother were amazed at what was being said about him. Then Simeon blessed them and said to his mother Mary, "This child is destined for the falling and the rising of many in Israel, and to be a sign that will be opposed so that the inner thoughts of many will be revealed—and a sword will pierce your own soul too."

There was also a prophet, Anna the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher. She was of a great age, having lived with her husband for seven years after her marriage, then as a widow to the age of eighty-four. She never left the temple but worshipped there with fasting and prayer night and day. At that moment she came, and began to praise God and to speak about the child to all who were looking for the redemption of Jerusalem.

When they had finished everything required by the law of the Lord, they returned to Galilee, to their own town of Nazareth. The child grew and became strong, filled with wisdom; and the favour of God was upon him.

Luke 2:22-40

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place will be no more
We’ll see Jesus face to face

From "There Will Be a Day" by Jeremy Camp

On the last day of school before Christmas break, the sixth graders from my school would go to the local shopping mall and sing Christmas songs. On the year that my class was to sing at the mall, we practiced a song called "Simeon and Anna." In this song, the girls would sing the part of Anna, asking questions to Simeon. They would sing, "Simeon, Simeon, did you see Jesus…?" and the boys would respond with the part of Simeon, "Yes, Anna, yes, I saw." We would go back and forth like this for several verses. The song ended with a twist. In the last verse, the girls would sing, "Simeon, Simeon, I think of Mary... Will great glory and joy fill her spirit?" The boys would respond, "No, Anna, no, a sword."

The music teacher decided that we would not sing this song at the mall. She figured that the people there would not understand the song. I would venture a guess that this is not a very familiar Bible story to most people. I know that I would probably not know this story very well were it not for the song I learned in sixth grade. Even those who read the Bible regularly could easily gloss over this story since it is sandwiched between two more familiar stories. Before this story we read about the birth of Jesus in the stable and about the shepherds who went to see Him. After this story we read about Jesus being separated from Mary and Joseph only to be found back at the Temple teaching the teachers, so to speak. Familiar or not, though, I think this story has a lot to say to us.

In this story, Jesus is just over a month old when He is taken by Mary and Joseph to the Temple. According to the Torah, every firstborn son is to be dedicated to the Lord’s service. At this ceremony, two very interesting people are present: Simeon the Righteous and Anna the Prophetess. Simeon was a very devout man who had been promised by God that he would not die until he saw the Messiah. Anna, whom the Bible calls a prophetess, was a widow who worshiped at the Temple day and night.

On the day of Jesus’ dedication, Simeon is led by God into the Temple, and, when he sees Jesus, he knows right away that he is the Lord’s Messiah. He then takes Jesus into his arms and breaks into song:

Master, now you are dismissing your servant in peace,
according to your word;
for my eyes have seen your salvation,
which you have prepared in the presence of all peoples,
a light for revelation to the Gentiles
and for glory to your people Israel.

It is no wonder that he would break into song at this moment. Simeon is finally seeing what he has waited so long for. He is seeing what the Jews had been awaiting for generations. The child that he was holding that day was the Messiah, the Lord’s Anointed, and the Chosen One who would bring salvation to Israel. Imagine what it must be like to see firsthand what your people have been awaiting for so long.

The story says that Mary and Joseph were amazed to hear what Simeon said about Jesus. I have never had a child, so I have never experienced the pride that a parent feels. I know, though, that a parent is proud when his or her child brings home a good report card or makes a spot on the sports team, or gets a solo in his school band. If these things make a parent proud, then imagine what Mary and Joseph must have felt that day, to hear this man saying these things. How would you feel if you heard that your child would be the salvation of your people and that he would be the glory of your people and that he would be a light to the nations?

After his song, Simeon blessed Mary and Joseph. He then turned to Mary and began to prophesy. He said, "This child is destined for the falling and the rising of many in Israel..." When Jesus was born, Israel had been under Roman occupation for over sixty years, and the Jews were looking forward to a messiah who would be a great political or military leader who would restore Israel back to its former glory as in the days of King David and King Solomon. The Jews would likely have interpreted Simeon’s prophecy to mean that Jesus would mean the falling of the occupying Roman government in Israel and the rising of Israel as an independent nation again. This sentiment can be seen in the movie King of Kings. In this interpretation of Jesus' life, the insurrectionist Barabbas hopes that Jesus will support his revolt against Rome. We know from history, though, that this is not what God had in mind.

Jesus would cause a different kind of upheaval in Israel. He caused the falling of the elite and the rising of the downtrodden. He brought down the teachers of the Law who were so wrapped up in the legalism of things that they missed the point of the Law entirely. He lifted up those who were looked down upon by such religious leaders. In the Gospel of Mark, Jesus said, "I have come to call not the righteous but sinners." He lifted up the poor, the unclean, the lepers, the prostitutes, the tax collectors, and the sinners, while knocking the Pharisees and Sadducees off of their high horse. This is just the way Jesus’ message is: it confounds the arrogant; it gives hope to the hopeless; it humbles the proud; and it lifts up the downcast.

Jesus’ message was so revolutionary that Simeon went on to predict the controversy that he would cause. He said that Jesus would "be a sign that will be opposed so that the inner thoughts of many will be revealed." Throughout the Gospels, we read of people constantly trying to trip Jesus up with trick questions, and we read of people constantly bringing accusations against him. Of course we know that time and time again He meets these questions and accusations head on, confounding His accusers even further.

Lastly, Simeon says to Mary that 'a sword will pierce [her] own soul too.' Most scholars understand this statement to be a prediction of the sorrow Mary would feel as she watches her Son being crucified thirty-three years later. While I’m sure that her Son’s crucifixion broke her heart, I wonder if this is really what Simeon was referring to. In his letter to the Ephesians, Paul refers to the Word of God as the "Sword of the Spirit." In the Revelation of John, Jesus is described as having a sword coming from His mouth. In the Bible, we read of many who were "cut to the heart" by the life and message of Jesus. The tax collector Zacchaeus, for example, gave up cheating people after meeting Jesus. Paul, after his encounter with Christ on the road to Damascus, turned from a life of avidly persecuting Christians to a life of ministry, spreading the Good News throughout the Middle East. I know that many of us in here could say how much the message of Jesus has cut us to the heart. I wonder if Simeon actually meant that Mary would be affected just as profoundly by her Son’s ministry.

The story goes on to mention another prophet Anna who also recognized Jesus as the Lord’s Messiah and immediately began spreading the Good News to others.

So what does this story have to say to us today? The Advent season reminds us that we too are waiting - and not just for Christmas. Just like Simeon and Anna, we too are waiting for our Messiah to come into the world and set things right. We are waiting for Jesus Christ to return to fix this fallen world.

There is a song that I love to hear on the radio, particularly after a bad day at work. It is by a Christian singer and songwriter named Jeremy Camp, and it is entitled “There Will Be a Day.”

I try to hold on to this world with everything I have
But I feel the weight of what it brings, and the hurt that tries to grab
The many trials that seem to never end, His word declares this truth,
That we will enter in this rest with wonders anew
But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering
There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place will be no more
We’ll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we’ll hold on to you always

I believe this artist must have been inspired to write these powerful and comforting words by chapter 21 of the Book of Revelation:
Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth; for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "See, the home of God is among mortals. He will dwell with them as their God; they will be his peoples, and God himself will be with them; he will wipe every tear from their eyes. Death will be no more; mourning and crying and pain will be no more, for the first things have passed away." And the one who was seated on the throne said, "See, I am making all things new."

I think that it is a shame that we usually only associate this passage with funerals, because I think that it is a good promise to remember in our day to day lives. When we look at the world around us, and when we turn on the news and see the injustice that plagues our world, and when the weight of the world has us down, we have this promise to remind us that someday, Jesus will return to restore the world to the way it was intended to be. Imagine a world where people will no longer toil in vain only to see the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. Imagine a world where people will no longer be subject to corrupt governments. Imagine no more bloodshed, no more crime, and no more hatred. The return of our Messiah will mean the falling of the greed and the corruption and the lust for power that seems to make the world go round, and the rising of justice and mercy and love.

So how can we be modern-day Simeons and modern-day Annas? How do we await the return of our Messiah? Jesus calls us all to be His disciples and to follow in His footsteps. We can await His return by continuing the ministry He started almost two thousand years ago, by loving God with our whole hearts, by showing His love to our neighbors, by worshiping and praising Him, by doing His will, and by responding to those in need. May the words “Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven” be not just our wish but our mission statement as well until that day when Christ returns to restore this fallen world to the creation God meant it to be.

Christ says, “Surely I am coming soon.”

“Amen. Come, Lord Jesus.”